Hello!
I saw your name on facebook and since you are a sex educator I wanted to
ask you 3 questions?
1.) Is it normal for a guy to want to watch a girl take a shit?
2.) Is it normal for a guy to eat a girls’ butthole out?
3.) Why does religion (especially Catholicism) try to say that any sexual
acts/intercourse before marriage is wrong and a sin… aren’t we suppose to
explore our bodies and sexuality?

• Chris; 28 y.o.
Texas


Dear Chris,
Your primary question seems to revolve around “am I normal”?  It is a
typical question for people who have questions around sex.  Normal,
abnormal and normative are statistical terms but have really no business
having an association with sex.  Wardell Pomeroy was noted as saying
“What is an abnormal act?  One that you can’t perform.”.  People have lots
of likes and dislikes when it comes to sex and sexuality.  Of primary
importance is almost always CONSENT and RESPECT.
As for your questions, watching someone “take a shit” isn’t a sex act per se,
unless you are deriving sexual pleasure from it, so let’s talk more about
that.  Do you feel it is a sex act?  How do you feel about watching someone
do this?  What makes it appealing for you?  If you are doing this now, is
this something that your partner is OK with having you watch or are you
watching/spying on someone without their consent?  The latter could get
you into hot water legally.
Analingus (aka “eating a girl’s butthole out”) is a sex act performed by both
genders and people of all sexual orientations.  It can be pleasurable for
both parties involved.  However, there are lots of health concerns because
of potential disease transmission (not just STI’s) when doing this so make
sure you are taking precautions when performing this.  Here’s a good link
with more info.  Here’s a great, (copy written), NSFW pic:
 http://www.flickr.com/photos/sassydude/3432040292/
I could go off on the last question but I’ll just say this, having grown up
Catholic myself, I know that I am much better off without the guilt and
shame that was taught to me as a young girl and hope to teach my children
that they can still be spiritual beings… and to quote from Jessica Valenti,

author of “The Purity Myth”, “teaching our daughters that their ability to
be good people should be based on their intelligence, on their compassion,
their kindness, not what they do with their bodies”.
Thanks for your questions Chris.  I hope this helps.
Best,
The MamaSutra