Vacation sex. Just saying it probably brings a smile—or at least a memory. Ragnar and I were reminded of exactly why it’s a thing when we finally got away for a weekend. No kids, no dog, no “what’s for dinner?” debates. Just us, a couple of Amtrak tickets, and a whole lot of uninterrupted time.

We called the trip Paso Pour Decisions.The name was cheeky, but the real indulgence was time together—walking hand in hand, exploring new places like Sensorio, laughing at the little discoveries along the way. Ragnar sampled some wine on the Taste of Downtown tour, while I soaked up the people-watching and the change of scenery.

So why does sex feel different when you’re away? And better yet, how can you bring that same spark home?

1. New scenery = new spark

Your brain loves novelty. When you’re walking cobblestone streets, eating food you didn’t cook yourself, or just waking up in a hotel bed that someone else made, you’re literally wired to feel more alive. Bonus: that buzz rubs off on your partner, too.

2. Bye-bye, stress brain

At home, your head is basically 37 open tabs: laundry, work emails, your kid’s science project, that squeaky dryer. On vacation? Tabs closed. And when cortisol drops, desire gets to step up and take the mic.

3. Time gets stretchy

Vacation gives you permission to slow down, to linger. Morning cuddles don’t end with an alarm clock. Afternoon RobeTime™️ slides into something more interesting. It’s less “scheduled quickie,” more “hey, we actually have all day.”

4. Play fuels passion

From wine tastings to laughing at inside jokes, vacations are packed with play. You’re not just having sex—you’re laughing, trying new things, getting lost on purpose. That sense of adventure melts right into the (hotel) bedroom.


How to Steal the Magic Back Home

You don’t need a plane ticket to feel that spark again. Try this:

  • Mini getaways. Book a night at a local hotel or Airbnb and treat it like Paris.
  • Flip the script. Eat dinner on the floor picnic-style, shower together at noon, or have dessert before the main course.
  • Block “us time.” Protect an evening where your only goal is connection (and no, scrolling side-by-side on the couch doesn’t count).
  • Say yes to silly. Dance in the kitchen. Play a game. Do something that makes you laugh—because play is foreplay.

Vacation sex isn’t magic. It’s just what happens when stress drops, play rises, and you let yourselves see each other with fresh eyes. The trick is bringing that energy home, one small adventure at a time.

Want help turning “vacation sex” into “regular life sex”? Book a session and let’s make it happen.

xxoo

Lanae

PS: If you’re ready to keep that vacation-sex energy alive year-round, my Confidence in Bed Starter Kit is a simple, fun way to build connection and pleasure into your everyday life.

Frequently Asked Questions About Vacation Sex

Why is vacation sex different?

Vacation sex feels different because the environment changes. Away from daily stressors, your brain gets a hit of novelty and relaxation, which boosts desire and makes intimacy feel more exciting.

How can couples bring vacation sex home?

You don’t need a plane ticket to recreate the spark. Try small changes like a local overnight stay, flipping your daily routines, or blocking time just for the two of you. The key is novelty, play, and removing stressors.

Is vacation sex normal for long-term relationships?

Yes! In fact, many couples find their most passionate moments on trips. It’s not about the location—it’s about the conditions. With a little intention, you can create those same conditions at home.


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About the Author The MamaSutra

Dr. Lanae St.John is a Diplomate of the American Board of Sexology and certified sex coach with a background in sexology and a passion for helping people improve their sexual health and relationships. She is the author of "Read Me: A Parental Primer for "The Talk"" and the upcoming "You Are the One: How stopping the search and looking inside will lead you to your romantic destiny," and is committed to staying up-to-date on the latest research and trends in the field. Dr. St.John aims to share her knowledge and expertise in a relatable and approachable way through her blog on lanaestjohn.com.

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